The following is adapted from All Rise.

Many years ago, I was frustrated with a fellow vice president for holding back the team’s growth. At the time, we were both VPs in two different departments, and I had to deal with his dominating behavior in meetings again and again. Everyone talked about it—his direct reports, his colleagues, and I would complain to each other about how he would get so excited about his own ideas that he would interrupt other people and take over the conversation. Collaborating with him seemed unbearable.

Finally, I decided to sit him down in a room and lay out all of my grievances. I chose a small conference room just big enough for two people and a fern. It was called the Zen Room, an ironic title given my intentions. When the meeting started, I let him have it. I recounted a year’s worth of examples of his behavior and pointed out how he was driving the team crazy. In response, he barely said a word. In that room, he became just another potted plant.

The next day, he pulled me aside to talk again. He said that he stayed up all night thinking about what I had said. He never realized others saw him that way, and he felt terrible. His eyes were glassy as he spoke. He promised he would change. And true to his word, over the next 12 months, he went from being my mortal enemy to a world-class executive and one of my most trusted colleagues.

Looking back, he wasn’t the real problem. I was. For more than a year, I had not given him any feedback. But what I came to understand is that feedback is not a privilege; it is a right. Our colleagues have the right to hear and learn from our feedback, and we have an obligation to provide it. Indeed, whether we are managers or not, we must all do our part to create a culture of continuous feedback.

Give Others a Chance to Grow

As attorneys, we need feedback. We crave it. And not just about our legal work but about our management style, our communication, project planning, and more. Feedback should flow in all directions, including upward, downward, and peer-to-peer. When we bottle up our feedback, we rob others of a chance to grow. 

Too often, though, this feedback does not materialize. Or when it does, the delivery may be so poor that we have to sift through the garbage to find the gold nuggets—as my colleague had to do when I unleashed my unproductive diatribe.

The strongest teams operate differently. They share feedback continuously and effectively, and their growth has no ceiling. Of course, building a culture like this does not happen overnight; it is a process of transformation. However, with practice—and the right approach—you will be able to create a strong feedback culture.

What do I mean by that? A strong feedback culture has four common tenets. First, quality feedback is concrete, actionable, and supportive. Second, growth requires both positive and constructive feedback. Third, feedback should flow in all directions, regardless of seniority. And finally, formal reviews should not contain surprises.

Better Feedback Through COIN

When we give feedback, a teaching mindset is crucial. That means engaging in a dialogue, asking thoughtful questions, looking for specific examples, and more. With this mentality in place, we can simplify the task of delivering constructive feedback using a more structured framework known as COIN: Context, Observations, Impact, and Next Steps.

Context

First, set the stage for feedback. Make sure it is the right time and place for feedback and that you have the person’s full attention. The weightier the feedback, the more important it is to create that space. The key is to make sure the person is ready and able to engage in what you have to say without distractions.

Observations

As you explain your feedback, start with just the facts, removing emotion and interpretation. Focus on specific actions, not generalizations. For example, do not say that the attorney “lacks attention to detail” or “seems disorganized.” These statements judge the person, rather than their actions. This emphasis on specific actions ensures that your feedback is concrete, which makes it far more useful.

Impact

Next comes the impact—the “so what.” Here, you explain how the behavior you just described affected the team or the outcome. Again, it is important to be specific. Conclusory impact statements like “this won’t fly with the client” or “our clients expect better” are not instructive. What do you mean it “won’t fly?” Why not? When you say clients expect better, what do they expect, specifically? If you do not clarify, you create more questions than answers.

Next Steps

Up until this point, we have been talking only about what happened in the past. Now, let’s shift toward the future. The “N” in COIN stands for “next steps,” meaning guidance for how to handle these kinds of situations going forward. 

This part of the conversation is intended to be a dialogue, not a monologue. Rather than leaping to your own suggestions, you might start with open-ended questions, such as asking about the other person’s original intentions—especially if you are giving feedback about interpersonal behavior. 

This is also the time for you to ask for ideas on how you can be helpful in the future. For example, if you are a manager and are talking to a junior member of your team, you might say, “Next time, try letting me know if you run into any unexpected issues so that I can weigh in on whether those issues are important or out of scope.” But in addition, you might also ask, “Could I have done a better job of clarifying the scope up front? How could I help you avoid these kinds of rabbit holes in the future?”

You can see how COIN supports the tenets of great feedback I described earlier. It is concrete because we are focused on examples and observations. It is actionable because we are focused on behavior that the person can change, not jumping to general conclusions about their character or ability to perform. And it is supportive because we are approaching this person with the intention to teach and to help—as a dialogue, not a diatribe.

Encouraging Candid Feedback

Having a framework like COIN can better equip attorneys for delivering feedback. But there is still one last barrier to overcome: trust. Just because people know how to give feedback does not mean they will always take advantage of the opportunity.

If you are in a situation where you are not receiving the kind of quality feedback you need to grow—whether that be downward feedback, peer feedback, or upward feedback—there are steps you can take to bring the other person to the table.

I think of this process as a gradual escalation. First—and perhaps most importantly—you have to give the person plenty of warning that you will ask for feedback. Set up time in advance and be clear that you would like to use the time to hear the other person’s feedback. If you ask for feedback out of nowhere, you are not likely to get the most thoughtful answer.

Second, you can communicate a feedback agenda. For example, you might tell them that you want to get their feedback on specific topics, such as how well you structure your writing, your client management skills, or other specific development areas. As an executive, I even used to ask for feedback on how well I give feedback.

If that still does not work, you can move to the third tactic: seeding the conversation. This is a way of softening the ground a bit by acknowledging your own development areas, essentially calling out the elephant in the room.

Finally, if all else fails, you can “give feedback on feedback.” Explain that you want the person’s candid feedback. Then open a dialogue, including asking if there is anything you could do to make them more comfortable sharing feedback.

Capitalize on the Momentum

Most of the time, steady escalation through these steps will open the floodgates. Once you finally start receiving genuine feedback, capitalize on that momentum. Follow up regularly—every four to six weeks—and ask if you are making progress in those areas. That will keep the trail of feedback from going cold.

Having a strong culture of continuous feedback is not just energizing—it’s liberating. Knowing your colleagues are being honest with you will give you greater confidence to take risks and grow, trusting your team has your back. Once you experience that culture, you never want to work any other way.

Want to download some of these tools in a handout format? Check out my Attorney Feedback Guide as a part of the free All Rise Toolkit. Or read more about creating a culture of continuous feedback in my book, All Rise, available on Amazon.

Ben Sachs is an expert in management, strategy, and negotiation. He teaches at the University of Virginia School of Law and provides consulting and training services to a wide range of government and private sector organizations around the world, including thousands of attorneys and other professionals through CLEs, seminars, and workshops.

Sachs’s professional career spans law and business. He first served as a litigator at Sidley Austin LLP and then as a strategic management consultant at the Boston Consulting Group before moving to Storyblocks, a technology and media company, where Ben served as general counsel and chief operating officer. After helping secure the company’s private-equity acquisition in 2020, he now focuses exclusively on teaching and consulting. He lives outside Washington, DC.